Intentions
by Frack
Summary: Setsuna wanted something more than a life staring at the Gates..


Well, at last. My first Sailormoon fan/fic! Hmm, I've always wanted to write about Setsuna because there are so few fan/fics about her and well, she's my fav character. Enough rambling, read the story, try to enjoy it and review, review, and review again. :)  
  
Disclaimer: All characters are property of Naoko Takeuchi.  
  
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"My Lord, I can't do it," I said. I tried to tell him why but he wouldn't listen.  
"But you have to.. you can't just let her die," he replied.  
Oh but I can, I thought to myself.  
He sighed. I instinctively reached out my hand to caress his face and comfort him but quickly pulled it back once I realized what I was doing.  
That was all so long ago. I was crazy, stupid, in love. I should have never agreed to it.  
A moan. A scream. He grew restless.  
"Please Setsuna, I beg you. Save her."  
He got down on his knees. How ironic. All these years I was the one begging silently for his affection.  
"My Lord, please, stand up. I will help the Queen," I replied.  
I laughed to myself. As if I had a choice. For him, I would have done anything. He smiled. His eyes shone with hope. My eyes did not change. They did not shine. They did not hope.  
"Thank you, Setsuna. Thank you." He hugged me. My arms ached to reach around him and hold him tightly forever. But that would be inappropriate. My hands stayed at my side. Cupboard love. I felt empty. I felt used.  
  
Turning back time was a simple act. I would have done it in a second if not for the oath I had made to Queen Serenity. Plus, I would change many things and there was no telling what could happen to the future. That meant nothing to him. I meant nothing to him. All he cared about was saving Neo Queen Serenity.  
I was never important to him, or anyone else. The only one that was important was Sailor Pluto. Not Setsuna. Who else could they find to stand at those damned gates day after day, year after year, millennium after millennium. And never did I complain. Not once. I never told Queen Serenity how much I wanted out of that bleak existence. How much I wanted to be normal. But instead, I had no friends, no love and ultimately, no life.  
  
I looked into his eyes. Those eyes that I lived for. Even in knowing they would never look at me the way I wanted them to. So why, you ask, did I live in silence like that? Because my friend, I had to. In the words of Queen Serenity, it was my destiny. I just had to accept it.   
  
My staff was pointed towards the sky. I glanced at Neo Queen Serenity. The source of all my pain. All my loneliness. It was so easy for her. She had everything. Everything that my life lacked. She lived glamorously. Oblivious to the rest of the world. She went to her fancy balls. Danced all night long. Lived happily. I certainly went nowhere. I was never invited anywhere. The rest of the Senshi were too caught up in themselves to remember that I existed. So I sat in my little room, stared at the gates, waited and rotted. Waited for what, I was never sure. Most likely for someone to dig up my memory somewhere buried deep in the trenches of their mind.  
  
But I suppose I should have given up that thought a long time ago. Just like I had given up my dreams. I remember that day clearly. I was so naive. I was so trusting. I was so stupid.  
  
"Setsuna, your time has come. Your old enough now to take on the responsibility of being the Guardian of Time; Sailor Pluto. Be proud." Queen Serenity said it as if it was a good thing. And I believed her.  
  
What I didn't know was that was the beggining of the end of my life. No more friends. No more hopes. No more Endymion. The hate I feel for her is indescribable. Even her daughter I hate, I envy. How can I not? Even then, I never meant for it to happen. I intended to save her. Intended being the key word. But I guess somewhere along the line, my intentions changed. I don't know how to describe it. It just happened. Dead Scream. The words just popped out of my mouth. Then, Neo Queen Serenity was silent. A scream. King Endymion. Oh, the irony of it all. I was supposed to save a life yet now I have to take two. I lift my staff again. I whisper the words. My dear, dear King Endymion is now not moving either. I start to cry. I walk over to him and caress him face. I kiss him. My tears soak through his clothes.   
  
I don't think. I raise my staff for the last time. Bright light. Everything is back to normal. Endymion lives. Serenity is healthy. I fall. My vision becomes blurry. And suddenly, I'm alone again. But I don't mind, I've always been alone. I close my eyes. I welcome death with a small smile. I don't have to stand in front of those gates anymore. Those damned gates.   
  
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And there you have it. I would really like to know what you think about it. I personally think it's not one of my best works. But, hey, what I think doesn't really matter too much. :). Please review. Please review. And please review.  
  
E-mail: fracky_00@hotmail.com 


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